Healthy Body Image & Mental Awareness
Hello Beautiful Soul-
May is Mental Health Awareness Month and I thought it would be appropriate to speak to you about healthy body image and tools to help shift an unhealthy mindset.
I recently joined a gym for the first time in over 5 years and I don’t remember feeling this excited. I enjoy the extra energy and good mood after my workouts, how healthy my body feels and how well I sleep. I didn’t use to feel this way when I worked out. As a matter of fact, from the time I was 17 until my late 20’s, the gym was a place of punishing myself when I didn’t look a certain way.
I grew up with a mindset that I had to look “perfect”. The actual words my mom started saying to me at a young age was, “You have to act and look perfect.” The definition of perfection in my household was outer beauty and not bigger than a size 2. And when I didn’t meet that criteria, I was called fat, ugly and I hated myself. I felt unloved. I blamed my lack of happiness and my-self worth all on the reflection staring back at me in the mirror.
This took a toll on my mental health. Thoughts of food and my body consumed my everyday. I would punish myself at the gym by spending hours on the treadmill, lifting heavy weights and obsessed about how I looked and was perceived 247. It was exhausting, led to anxiety, extreme low self-esteem, depression, body dysmorphia and controlling what and how much I ate.
It wasn’t until after I had babies, and was struggling with Lyme disease and several autoimmune disorders that my focus switched to making sure I was healthy to take care of my kids and be here to raise them. I began to look inward and do the work. I had to deconstruct the negative self-talk and reprogram my way of thinking. I had to rebuild the relationship with myself and begin to love and respect who I saw reflect back at me in the mirror.
Reprograming took some time, however using these tools helped me shift my mindset to a healthy version of myself.
1. Take a step back, literally! Words and thoughts are very powerful and they do not have power over us, unless we choose to give our power away. When a negative thought creeps in, STOP. Take a step back and take several deep breaths. Tell yourself, “No, I will not let this thought run my day. I am taking my power back right now!” Then say out-loud 3 things you like or value about yourself. This may be hard at first, especially if your thoughts and words are negative most of the time. However, when you begin to pause, acknowledge your thoughts and work at changing them to a healthier perspective, you begin to reprogram your mindset. Slowly my thoughts of, “I hate how I look today”, became, “I will not give my power to these thoughts. I know I have some work to do on changing the way I talk and look at myself, but I am incredibly grateful for my olive completion, how healthy by body is becoming and how much my body has supported me through my pregnancies.”
2. Analyze what triggers your negative body image. For me, I realized stress was a big trigger for me. Every time I felt stress (which was often), I would take it out on my body. When I began to look at stress as a big part of my unhealthy habit and negative mindset, I began to incorporate breath-work, calming meditation, therapy, energy healing, walks to slow down in nature and other tools to help calm my nervous system and work on processing my stress and emotions in a healthy way.
3. Fight the diet downfall. Research has found that when restrained eaters are exposed to commercials/ads related to diet, weight loss or fitness, they experience negative emotions and are more likely to then overeat. I got rid of all my fitness magazines and my scale and began to look at food as nurturing, healing & medicinal for my body instead of “good” and “bad”. I began to incorporate intuitive eating and become fully present in each bite as I sat down to eat. Meal planning and food prepping also helped me plan for the week so the thought of food and what I was going to eat didn’t stress me out.
4. Ask yourself “What is the legacy I am trying to build for myself? Or what do I want to be remembered for?” This is a question I would go back to every time a negative thought would come up. I wanted to be a positive role model for my kids. My mission became to be the healthiest version of myself and to break the cycle. This helped change my focus to my purpose and away from my bad habits.
5. Feel all the feels. Some of us self-sabotage by beating ourselves up, others self-sabotage by numbing out our emotions. There is so many ways us humans try to avoid uncomfortable emotions. It is so important to sit with the discomfort of a negative body image, instead of trying to solve it by restricting and depriving yourself. Commit to feeling the discomfort, while implementing tools, in order to feel the feelings and then set them free.
6. Show gratitude to every part of your body. In my daily meditation practice or at the end of my yoga practice I take several minutes to thank every party of my body. I thank my strong legs for supporting me, my reproductive organs for carrying my babies. I bring appreciation to all parts of my miraculous body for serving me each and every day. This appreciation leads to an expansive grateful heart, ignites the soul and spirit and reminds us that we are so much more than our bodies.
7. You are enough! You always have and always will be. Say this out loud 3 times each time you look into the mirror. Let this be your mantra or your daily affirmation to start that shift into seeing yourself the way you’re suppose to be seen.
And lastly, if you are struggling do not suffer in silence. Reach out to a professional, trusted family members and/or friends. I want to remind you that you are not alone when it comes to your mental health and any difficulties that you might be having in your life right now. You deserve love, respect, rest, support and be celebrated, no matter how you are feeling.
Sending so much love,
Dena